tweet tweet

As of last Thursday, some asshole in my building (or possibly the next door building facing the courtyard) has gotten a BIRD.

I will never understand people who keep birds for pets. They aren't particularly affectionate or compelling, and they are FUCKING NOISY. Birds are social animals; that is why they sing and twitter. So how cruel is it to not only cage a FLYING animal, but then to keep it alone?

It makes no sense to me.

And, to have one in a crowded downtown apartment building? Well, if I knew who it was, I'd go poop on their door.

The singing is somewhat charming in the afternoon, at least, it was the first time I heard it. BUT. The bird wakes up at 6am every morning.

Paul did not believe me. He keeps telling me it is a starling or something, taking up residence in the courtyard. I have lived in that apartment for eleven years. There are NO starlings in my neighborhood. No tweet-tweet, pippity-pip birds. Just a lot of pigeons (which I don't mind, toxic shit or no). Pigeon noises are sort of creepy and occasionally dirty-sounding, but ultimately low and unobtrusive.

Someone needs to die. And it's not the bird, it's the jackass keeping the damn thing in a downtown San Francisco studio apartment.