Thursday, July 27, 2006


I took Paul out to Supperclub last night.
This was our second time, and we had to go because:
a.) Marisa was singing
b.) Every course of the meal was to have chocolate as an ingredient
c.) I totally needed to go someplace nice with Paul, since I've been working too much on this James stuff.

Dinner was awesome. The performances were great, the room was great, the company was great, the food was great. The Black Cherry drop cocktail was great. The only thing that wasn't great was the service. I hate to say this, because, I mean, the waitress was *nice,* and personable, and interactive, but when it came to the waitressing part, she lacked.
The first problem was that we couldn't get water. When we sat down, we were asked what kind of water we wanted. We all(there were 8 people, two at each table, that we knew) wanted still.
So still water came. ONE carafe, set at the middle table. (we're still not sure how we got three tables for two parties of four)
We asked for water again. There was popcorn on the tables with bittersweet chocolate powder. It was tasty, but made me more thirsty. No water. The food started coming out, and I asked the other server for water. The waitress took my order for a bottle of wine.
The water didn't come. I asked a third person for water, now that I had my first course and nothing to drink still. I tried to get Paul to go out into the bar to get us water.
The wine came, but it was the wrong bottle. How about some water?
Finally the water came, and then the correct wine.
Then wonderful food and performance, including the waitress dropping and breaking a glass. I can't really complain about that; I too have dropped and broken things. The waitress was nice, and energetic.
Marisa was awesome; she just keeps getting better and better.
Then some more silliness with an extra glass of wine, and the clincher was that, despite the fact that we were clearly four separate couples (in fact on two separate reservations of 4 tops), the waitress clumped the bill for eight people onto one bill. It took me a while to figure this out; I thought she was just forgetting to bring us our bill. The only upside to doing this, as far as I can tell, is that by making us one large party, they add that automatic gratuity. What. Ever. I'd tip more if you hadn't, and especially if I hadn't had to ask everyone else for water so many times. I mean, nice person and all, but just not really cut out to waitress I guess.

Hot tip for Supperclub: put a carafe of water on every table before you seat people. It's easy, and it will make people happy.

Other than service glitches, everything else was great. REALLY, if you are thinking of a big splurge meal, this is an awesome place for it. You will leave feeling so very relaxed and happy, and well-fed.

Anyway, after Laguna Seca, I just really shouldn't go anywhere without my Camelbak.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Dry Lake

We got up at the asscrack of dawn Saturday to go to MotoGP.
Last year, we got there and spent an hour waiting to get in. I swore I would not return. Laguna Seca cannot get their shit together.
I lied, and I did return.
This time, the line moved OK getting in, but once in the gate, we rode around the entire goddam place trying to find where we were supposed to park. I know, some places you go, they do fancy things like post big signs, but not here! They wanted us to have a tour of the place first. We drove every direction, and yes, I stopped several times to get directions from the various traffic directors. They directed me a lot of places. The last place was to the parking area. Good job, dumbasses!

Fine, so we're parked and on our way finally. We got a bunch of beer (Porter, even, not some pissy frat boy shite) and felt a little better. Oh, yeah, it's HOT. It's going to be even hotter, we know this. I've camped in 110+ weather before, and this doesn't surprise me. We have our camelbak, and a ton of sunscreen, and are staying out of the sun anyway.

But it becomes clear as the day goes by that it is not hot, like, complaining hot. It is, in fact, dangerous hot. I don't like crowds anyway, and being surrounded by idiots kind of freaks me out. In the tent where we stop to sit for a while, there are about a million people eating lunch. We look around to see a lot of people who don't even know their bodies are crashing. I see kids who are completely flushed, and their parents clueless. Heat is actually very hard on your body, folks! I know, we are from California, and not particularly aware of this. But it's kind of sad and scary. We watch a lot of ambulance activity taking place around us. Water? Costs FOUR DOLLARS a bottle! We sat in the lobby area of the bathroom near the paddock entrances/food area, where I had just soaked my shirt again in the sink, and we sat loading up on salt in the form of some noodles, and even sucking down soy sauce packets. Refilled the camelbak and gave our bodies some rest. After a guy came in and then actually dropped in front of us, we were like, "fuck this place, this is getting bad," and left.
It must have been around 3:30 when we got up to our bikes, stepped into our sun-warmed snowsuits, and got on the road again. The most racing I saw was on the way out of the place, I caught a glimpse of some folks riding around the track. Hey, guess what, I'm riding too! I guess that's at least as good as watching some guy I don't even know ride.

On the freeway, I got incredibly sleepy, and pulled off. Paul was the same, and we literally parked at a shopping mall and napped in the grass there. Heat exhaustion is no joke.

After a mall dinner, we rode home, which was more misery. It never got cool. Windchill was more like riding into a hot hairdryer. Even San Francisco was hot, and my apartment didn't cool off until, oh, about 3am.

I hate hot weather.
I hate Laguna Seca.
I hate $4 water.
Motorcycles are still cool.

Friday, July 21, 2006


My brother just sent me ultrasounds of Critter.
Usually, I don't get into baby pictures and certainly not pre-baby pictures, but somehow, this one is really neat. I'm excited.

It's the cycle, happening right now in front of me.

Oh, yeah, and Critter has two feet. Check that off the list of things to worry about.


I'm stretched too thin.
We all are, and some of the weirdness is bubbling up to the surface. Politics are coming out of the woodwork. People are snapping.

Some people have been snapping all along, but lately, even the core group is getting to wit's end.

I'm tired, really, really tired. I don't get enough sleep. I can't remember the last time I got to sit on my couch and do the silly shit I do like balance my financial statements, read a book, or study my Chinese. I don't think we've been to Lanesplitter in over a week. That's, like, a record.

Everything I type is rife with typos and spelling errors.

My house is a disaster, and I can't go to the store or do laundry.

I worry and cry and I can't sleep when I do get to bed.

Not that any of this is enough.

There's still more to do. And now on top of that, there will be outbursts and criticisms and interpersonal dramas. I'd walk away, but it's not about me or my comfort level. I said I was willing to push this. I hadn't really wanted to lose friends over it. It's well known that there are people I'm working with that I really don't even like. I expected those outbursts and laugh them off. But I almost can't bear the wear on friendships I value. I don't want to be drawn into politics. Can we just get the job done? Everyone is tired. The less hysterics we have, the less tired we will make ourselves. I've been ignoring the bullshit from the people I expected it from, but I need the rest of us to stick together. It's not me that needs it most, though. This isn't about us.

I can't give up even though I wish I could. I just want to walk away. But this is not an option. If I cared less, maybe I would. It's too important.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Yesterday I watched a bicyclist collide with a car in Berkeley. Maybe it was technically Oakland, but close enough.

It was the bicyclist's fault, completely. Hey, genius, don't pass a car on the left that is making a left turn.

Seriously, if you can't ride properly, just don't. Buses were made for people like you.
I felt bad for the driver just then.

But what's news for ME?
Not a lot. I'm really crazy lately, trying to get EVERYTHING done. We are getting close to the August 5th/6th event, and there's a lot of cat herding left to do. And real errands, like getting posters and flyers, and all that.

It is coming together, but people are starting to get weird. It's been a few weeks now of work, and some of the personalities are bubbling up to the surface in not so pleasant ways. Whatever.

I've been sick since thursday. I don't really know how I managed to get a cold in July when no one else I knew was sick, but I'm guessing it mostly has to do with the fact that I've been running myself ragged. There is a ton of stress in my life right now, and the only thing keeping me sane anymore is Paul. So I figure the people around me who are losing their shit ought to be pitied because they don't have Paul to make everything better. Well, I'm not sharing, so there.

Girls weekend was a bit of a wash, since I was all sicky and tired. Plus, my sister-in-law is all knocked up and can't drink. Still, nice to hang out and kill time with my family.

I finally got a new front tire on my SV. I was amazed at what a difference it makes in the handling. I mean, it just corners so much better. I forgot what it was supposed to feel like. Maybe I shouldn't be so cheap. The DRZ is still not on the street because some of the spacers I need to replace are on backorder, as is the new front tire. I decided to upgrade to distanzias, but the front is a no-go so far. Maybe I'll do a Distanzia rear and an MT21 front? That's not funny unless you're a dualsport tire geek. Nevermind, I have a headache.

This weekend: MotoGP. Saturday only, just because that's how we roll. Sunday will be nice.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Now one foot, now the other

A children's book I grew up with which I think of daily.

Thursday night, Paul did something that made me very proud to be associated with him. He is The Best(TM) and I am so proud to be seen with him. I mean, there's the obvious hottness factor, but gee, he is so nice. And he knows me, and what is important to me, and understands it in a way no one else ever could.

Times lately have been not so good, but it's all OK, because I have this man at my side.

Thursday night, SFMC again, meetings, etc.
Friday morning, I had to go down to Redwood “City” to drop off some paperwork for our speeding tickets. Po-po bitches!

Friday afternoon, I got a phone call from Tim, from the Isle of Man, just checking in to chat about James. These people are the most incredible strangers, taking care of James like he was family to them. I asked Paul the other day if he'd like to move to the Isle of Man. People there seem so amazing. Nevermind the fact that I could only understand about 50% of what Tim said. The accent is strong, but that makes it more interesting I guess.

Friday night we ate at Priya. Priya is damn tasty. Then we watched about half of a Chinese movie I rented, while hanging out with Squeeky cat, who is all busted. This is one of the downstairs cats, and it's no secret that he's my favorite. Unfortunately, he also gets injured more than any of the other cats. We found him to have a huge swollen chest thingy the other day, and Friday the vet finally had time to see him. It was huge abscess, and now he has a drainage tube and one of those big stupid Queene Anne collars, and we have to give him antibiotics. It is sad, and he's all confused and unhappy, but he was very happy to have our our company. Poor little boo!

Saturday we walked around and got some stuff organized for a raffle that evening. I worked at New Wave City Saturday night, and Steve and Skip had offered to raffle off prizes at the club, with the money from raffle ticket sales going to benefit James Cornell. They don't even know James, and we are all very thankful for their generosity.

Right now, Paul is working on my DRZ while I catch up on some tasks I have not gotten around to yet for James' fundraisers. We've done a lot of great stuff already, and more is in the works. It's pretty amazing to see the outpouring of help. I really think we can do this, if we just keep our shit together and put one foot in front of the other. James has gotten me through some pretty hairy situations, and I know we can return the same. Now one foot, now the other...

That's how the journey goes when you can't see the end. But somehow, you get there, one step at a time. We can do it, we will do it.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Math Class is Tough! Let's go Shopping!

Fourth of July was like it has been: family, food, friends, really tiny fireworks...

That's nice and all, but sort of lazy. I don't think our forefathers were this lazy in the face of a truly fucked-up tyranny. feh.

This morning on my way to work, my mind was racing with things I need to do. "I'll put that on my to-do list when I get to my computer..."

But now that I'm here, I'm drawing a blank. I already have a long list of things to do, none of which have to do with this office. I need to focus, and get through the day, to get home to do this stuff.

Which brings me to one of things floating around the top of the list, having to do with finding a new job. I am ready to move on from this one. I've been asking people at parties what they do for a living, and how they got there, and what they like about their jobs. I don't know, I'd like a change of scenery, and you never know who will tell you something that piques your interest. So, tell me stories. What do you do? What did it take to get there? What do you like about your job? Where do you see yourself career-wise, in five years? Ten years?

Outside of that, I'm pretty occupied with coordinating fundraisers for James. I'm beating a dead horse, and I'm not going to stop until James comes home and has that cup of hot chocolate with me at the place on Fillmore. These tasks are consuming, and Paul is being very patient with me.

Then I signed up for Fall classes, this time TWO. Intermediate Conversational Mandarin, and Intro to Macroeconomics. I've been really interested in economics lately, mostly because I didn't take a class like that in high school, and feel like it's something I ought to understand. But now I'm realizing what kind of math I'll need. And... it's been a while. I mean, I was good enough at math in high school, indeed I was on the "accelerated/honors" track, but that was a long time ago! Aaack! I promise you we did not do calculus in art school, though I am pretty quick with fractions as a result of my patternmaking experience. Math class is tough! Let's go shopping!

And will I regret overextending myself come class time? But I really want to learn! And one class per semester would be soooooo sloooooow.

And what about other things? Like, didn't I used to have a motorcycle? Oh, yeah, I have two, and they are both a little ratty right now. DRZ needs work, and maybe this weekend will get the shift shaft seal and wheel bearings replaced, perhaps even swap out wheels and tires so I can start riding around on the street more? The SV has a mostly bald front tire, and FedEx has shipped the replacement to the wrong place. ugh. Damn, but I miss the days when I actually could ride.

James Cornell needs help

One of my dearest friends, James Cornell, is in a coma in hospital at the Isle of Man in the Irish Channel. He and his driver crashed while racing last month. All the info is here: and

In addition to being a major contributor to the Bay Area biker community (Vampires, San Francisco Motorcycle club, Helimot), James has been extensively involved in the local night club and underground scenes.

Here's the latest coverage from Friday's article in the SF Chronicle

I am asking all of you to send $20 via Paypal to, or send a check payable to the San Francisco Motorcycle Club, 2194 Folsom, San Francisco, CA 94110 The paypal link is on the website above.

Ask yourself, If anyone you called friend were lying in a hospital bed 7000 miles away, would it be worth $20.00 to get him or her home?

This is one of my dearest friends, and I am in agony waiting for something to happen. We need to raise $50,000 for a medivac flight in a very short period of time.

Please help. Please share this message to those you Love.

Thanks Very Much,