If I promise to miss you, will you go away? I hear Kansas is cheap.

The house search has been going… well, not at all, really.
There’s a little something wrong with everything I guess. Basically, we don’t make enough money to even rent in the area. I guess. Or there’s too much pickiness.

Things we need and want, in no particular order:
- Garage (need) (garage must be private garage where we can work on bikes and stuff, not shared garage or carport crap.)
-Cat accepted (need)
-Yard (Paul) or deck or patio or something
-In San Francisco (Rebecca- VERY VERY much prefer)
-Near the freeway (both want)
-Not ghetto (i.e. I can walk to the store by myself at night) (Rebecca need)
-Not in the middle of nowhere (i.e. not Alameda) (Rebecca want)
-West of the Bay to be close to the SC hills (Rebecca want)
-East of the Bay to be close to work (Paul want)
-If it’s in East Bay, would like near BART for occasional commutes (Rebecca want)
-“East Bay” does not include places like “Concord,” “Martinez,” Pleasanton,” etc. Those are NOT the fucking East Bay. (both agreed)
-Dishwasher (Paul want)
-Laundry (Paul, mostly, but it would be nice for me too. I have an unnatural hatred of laundromats, but am resigned to them all the same)

Here’s my ideal: A beautiful craftsman-style home with attached two-car garage in Potrero Hill (North Slope), with yard and cat-friendly. Alternatively, would also like a SoMA split-level loft with attached garage and deck-garden in the back. See, I’m flexible?

So, now we’re looking at Albany, which, as I’ve learned, is a micro-city just north of Berkeley. It’s close to where Paul lives currently.

I keep thinking that I can compromise, and live in the East Bay. OK, I can do this. But every time I go to Paul’s house after work (worse now that it’s dark during the commute, although I can’t figure out WHY) I get stuck in that horrible East Bay traffic I’ve always hated. What is it about the East Bay? There’s nothing there, so why is the traffic so bad? Splitting lanes on the bridge is usually OK, I mean, whatever, but every fucking day? It’s gonna get old real fast. I’m a very impatient person. And I keep thinking, if I’m doing this every day, it’s just a matter of time before one of these mindless shits hits me in the quest to get three feet ahead in the next lane over. (Listen, you dumb single-occupant car fuck, if you want to get there faster, LOSE THE GODDAM CAGE) So, yeah, just a matter of time, right? And the rain. Yes, I have split the bridge in the rain. I hate it. God, and when it’s windy? Oh, that fucking sucks. Really. Sucks. Gusts can get up to like 50mph and in a downpour, when you’re forced to ride at like 20mph by the cages (pass left, drive right is a lost concept on the bridge no matter what the weather is) it can be nearly impossible to control your bike. Let alone lanesplit. Not really much of an option in those conditions. So the nice weather days would suck, and the shit weather days would be fucking horrible.

Ugh.
Thinking about it fills me with yuck.

But there has to be some sort of compromise. There are benefits too for consolidating our lives. More time, less frantic. Sharing a place means we could each get more stuff done in our lives while still seeing each other. I would be living with both of my bikes. We’ll cook more and eat out less, probably. Simplify. Make room and time for the things we’re both neglecting.

But the housing market is ridiculous. So, it’s still a no-go.

Next installment: perhaps a discussion of my theory on “polyamory” is so popular in San Francisco. In short: it’s the only way to afford the housing. Two incomes NOT ENOUGH!