Monday I am returning to the office, and I have switched from feeling overwhelmed with the Molly-ness of everything all the time, to missing her fiercely just thinking about going to work. The past couple of days, I have gotten to spend some quality morning time just the two of us while Paul sleeps (we still basically take shifts, but they overlap now. Paul takes the evening take-four-hours-to-get-the-baby-to-bed, and I take the morning)
We have some quiet time in the morning, just Molly and me. At least until Monday.
She grows so fast. In fact! Last Tuesday, before Thanksgiving, she was up to 10 lbs, 14 oz, and this week, she was up to 11 pounds, 8 oz. She's totally blown through all of her newborn stuff and moved on to the big kid stuff. Soon she will outgrow the little "Newborn Napper" part of her Pack and Play that she has been sleeping in. Which Paul and I are sort of dreading, since we don't know how well she will transition.
Everything that has anything to do with sleep is heavy with all sorts of emotional baggage for me, and I neurotically worry about it and dread every night. It literally takes hours of fighting to get her to sleep at night (she's doing it right now as I type). Yay. So pretty much, my life will be: get up really early, fight the weather to ride to work, work all day, fight the weather and traffic to get home in time to switch off with Paul, balance baby and working from home in the evening (let's just be honest about the fact that my work always comes home with me), and then fighting the baby for several hours to get a few hours of sleep before repeating. Hooray! This is the part where I, as a parent, am required to say "It's so worth it!"
It's not good or bad, it's just the path we are on.
She really is charming when she is not screaming. Mostly in the morning. She fights naps too. But in between? Adorable! Lots of smiles. And some fantastic burps.