They finally told me that they don't support Macintosh. Which? has zero to do with DNS or why the stuff wasn't showing up in their little user settings console. (I knew this but just to be a good little user, I tested by using Paul's Windoze machine, with Internet Exploder, and it still wasn't there) But let it be a warning to any other Mac users out there: Comcast doesn't want your business, and the opt-out service (and who knows what else) are not supported for Macintosh. And they won't tell you this up front.
"After reviewing your email and checking my resources, I found out that the disable option is not available for Macintosh and likewise Intel Mac OS X 10.5 is not yet supported by us as of this time. Most Mac-compatible features of Comcast High-Speed Internet (CHSI) should work with Leopard; however, as Leopard is not yet officially supported by Comcast, there may be some Mac-compatible CHSI products that will not work. I do apologize for any inconvenience this may cause."In case anyone besides Comcast is living under a rock, Leopard was released over 2 years ago-- not exactly bleeding edge.
Here's what I want from an ISP: send my fucking packets. The way you're supposed to. Not redirecting them to some craptastic site that makes you more money and wastes my time. The way I have my settings in my browser should be the way things work. I just want the intertubes. To send my stuff through. Not your "service" that you won't allow me to opt out of. I don't want any of your vaguely mentioned "Mac-compatible CHSI products that will not work." NO products, please! Just Internet Service. Tubes. Or, a dumptruck, or whatever.
Took me ten minutes, set it at the router level, and so far, so good. I trust google not to override my choices. I may be biased, but they have not done me wrong so far.
Update: 10 minutes later, I recieve my first bill from Comcast, and they are already trying to overcharge us. The recurring service they are trying to bill me is $15 more than we agreed on. I saved the original chat with the original number, but I'm guessing this is why they've been so opaque all along.